The Monkey Barrel

Archive for October, 2007

About two weeks ago it was the end of the night and mommy was just about done in with two fighting boys for the night. I repeatedly asked Luke to pick up his legos and he repeatedly refused. I even tried “the look” and he just sassed me back and said “no I not clean it up”. I gave him one more warning than I should and then had to spank him. He cried, had a red thigh, got a bath and and jammies and a lot of kisses from an overly tired mom who cracked. So I am telling my mother in law this story and the boys are in the living room listening. John gets off the couch and says very quietly “hey Luke, come over here”. He tells Luke in a sing-songy voice to get over there and pick up his legos or he’s getting a spanking. Luke, instantly wise to the game, says “no, John, you do it” and John pretend spanks him. Then Luke turns John around and does the same to him. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, but I thought good grief, if I had done that at their age I’d have been sent to my room for the rest of my life.

Flash forward to this morning and my sweet Luke crawls into my bed and I ask him the usual questions. “Did you sleep good?” yes mommy. “Did you have nice dreams?” yes mommy “What did you dream about honey” I dreamed I ona boat “oh yeah? who else was on the boat?” John “is that it?” no, piyates too “oh my goodness, you had a pirate dream” Yeah, dey kill Luke, Luke all gone. Luke a skeleton “Oh my gosh Luke, were you scared?” No {{{giggle giggle giggle}}}}

Most of you know that our family has become very involved in our church over the last year. It has been an awesome experience to once again find a church that feels like home and family. This year I was asked to join the leadership team for the moms group and I welcomed the opportunity to give back a little of the blessing I have received. Tomorrow morning I’m slated to give my testimony to this group of moms. Totally intimidating. I do not speak well in front of people. I get all shaky and I cry, and I feel like I’m gonna throw up and most of what I mean to say gets lost. I keep trying to write it out and it just sounds wrong. I think part of the problem is that our testimony is never a one time experience, it’s an ongoing telling of a life dedicated to a God we can never live up to or deserve. Every minute of every day for me is another moment that I can add to the tree of my living testimony. Every day is another day in which I am grateful for a Father who is full of forgiveness and grace that my life needs the lions share of and still He has more to give to each and every person who asks it of Him. I cannot imagine how tomorrow will actually play out and the words that will and must come, but I pray that whatever they are, they do not detract from the fierce love I hold for my Saviour. I pray that anyone who hears what the Holy Spirit will lead me to say will hear above all that the love I bear witness to and call my own is not only available to them, but always has been from the minute He thought to create us. And if you are reading this and you do not know, that Saviour who died for me, died for the love of you too. He knew from the birth of creation that if no other person were saved but you, that He would have done it all the same, just for you. Just for you. Just for you. Just for the love of you.